Colors of my life – Shashi Kumar DharaniMay 10, 2016
Welcome! My life is a mixed bag of positive and negatives, like most of you. However, how it balances between the two is a bit interesting.
I live in a small family in Badarpur, South Delhi, with my father, mother and our dog named ‘Hunter’. We are a family originating from southern India, from a place called ‘Avadi’, which is a military area about an hour’s ride by train from Chennai, Tamil Nadu. I have a younger sister who is now married and presently living in Australia.
To understand my journey in some detail, lets know a bit more about my origins. My grandfathers (both from my mothers and my father’s side) belonged to farming based families with lots of farmlands and far more relatives in a big clusters living together, I could boast of that saying most of the folks from my parents village are my relatives. However, since they were too rich and prosperous for their time and region, ensuing in-fighting amongst relatives resulted in my grandparents getting separated. On one hand my father had so live with some nasty relatives who gave him one meal a day, on the other hand my mother had to search for drinking water across long distances on a daily basis to survive. Their ordeal is something which is shown in movies or written in books.
My father and my mother survived a very harsh childhood and somehow met each other and got married; they shifted to Delhi from Chennai with only 40 Paisa in hand to start a life together. Both of them survived the harsh life ahead and were able to give me and my sister a very good and comfortable life and education.
My upbringing was with a fair bit of discipline and kindness included together. I learned some facts of life directly from my parents and verified it myself in practice. Turned out the principles I follow till date are as hard to apply in today’s world as they were anytime before. For example, telling the truth every time; this alone is barely possible nowadays. I know for sure that what I tell will be taken advantage of and will probably be used to hurt me later. The only good thing about this approach (which I guess is the intended effect) is that I don’t do anything unnecessary and specially anything which may harm innocent people.
I was an average student in school (mostly because I had no idea why I was learning the stuff I was; some remain a mystery till date), above average in sports (which was fun; still remains fun for me) and exceptional at thinking, analysis and supporting ideas/people (which is what I still do; in my own way).
I graduated school as an introvert; hesitant of society in Delhi (can’t be sure about such things even today). I felt I needed to change, but without any guidance it was very hard. I came to know that one part of our society’s approach today is to keep critical information for anyone’s well-being well hidden from that person. Most people recommend a very lengthy, expensive and exhaustive method to achieve even the most basic living standard and life experience. I paid an exorbitant amount of money (sponsored by my parents mostly), to study multiple disciplines (Information Technology, Business administration, Foreign Languages, Fitness & Martial Arts, Philosophy and more). Ultimately, I pursued a career in Fitness & Martial Arts simply because it made me happy and I could help others be safe and/or healthy.
I also figured out the hard way that apart from effort and education, location plays a vital part in any course of action in life. For example, almost every person I’ve met outside my city, have been fairly honest and supportive (which is the exact opposite of where I live). I soon learnt that being in a good location matters a lot, but since one of my objectives is to support my parents, I have not relocated to any better place. Another example being my profession, after years of tough training, lots of injuries (some which haven’t healed even till date) and countless hours of practice and analysis, I became a freelance instructor. However, most people I meet have no clear expectation/goals for themselves and therefore no idea in the way I train people. Everyone wants to be the best without putting the required effort. When they get some idea of what is needed, the first thing they quit is training. Convenience overshadows everything for most people.
I struggled in my profession, simply because I was highly overqualified in my thinking and approach. Fortunately, I trained some good trainees who still appreciate what they learned. In reflection of my prime years, I am happy that they will have a very good chance to be safe and healthy in the future.
As for me, I continue learning new things as and when I can. I am currently studying Japanese language, simply to enjoy Anime, games and movies. I was selected for a sponsored study trip to Japan for a couple of weeks last year and made friends across the globe. I came to realize that one needs to travel a bit and learn of other cultures and trends. During my trip I learnt a lot about other countries, their customs, and friendliness in general and have developed some bonds which may last till the end of my days. I have a few reliable friends, some very good teachers who guide me as needed and a fair idea on how to live my life ahead.
We all have some talents and passion; that which can easily guide us to happiness, which I believe is the one thing we need. I for one do not want to see the end of my time with regrets on not being able to live my life because of my stupidity or lack of understanding. I suggest everyone reading this to find that,what makes them happy and pursue it diligently to live a life without regrets.
I personally want the second half of my life to be a simple, happy one; something for which I have gone through hell on earth, physically, mentally and intellectually. I believe that we will all be able to get what we desire most, as long as we stay true to ourselves. Don’t give up, keep going, do what needs be done. Be free, live happily.